Internal Goals for 2018

Here is my list of new year’s resolutions for 2018. Let’s see if we share the same internal goals for 2018. Here it goes…

  1. I always find it easy to build new friendships as long as both of us are given some quality/private time together. What I find it hard to do is to differentiate between toxic friendship and nurturing friendship. Today, I read an article about insights from Aristotle. According to Aristotle, there are three kinds of friendships. First, it’s the “utility” friendship whereby both friends are together just for some mutual benefits which are external. For example, a friendship at work whereby its purpose is to get advantages for some selfish purposes or convenience. Second, it’s the “pleasure” friendship. For example, a friendship whereby its purpose is to just pass the time with pleasure. Some possible pleasurable activities include discussing about their favourite k-pop star or hobbies. Between these two types of friendships, the second one (“pleasure” friendship) is better due to its nurturing nature compared to the first which is toxic and manipulative sometimes. However, both could be temporary. As one party needs to move on to another job or migrate somewhere, the distance will kill the friendship ultimately. There’s the third kind of friendship called the “soulmate” friendship. This is the best which we should look forward to. The “soulmate” friendship can last for a lifetime. Of course, a “pleasure” friendship might develop into a “soulmate” friendship if we spend time “gardening” our friendship. The “soulmate” friendship is maintained through our admiration and appreciation towards the other party’s positive values. It is the kind of friendship which can stand all rains and storms. Our soulmate is always there to help and learn about life adventures together with us. Together we grow…
  2. People around me are travelling to beautiful places now and then. On social media, I always see pictures from their recent travels. I have been invited for a trip overseas by a few friends. However, I always turn down the invitations by saying that I am saving my first bucket of gold. Being exposed to lots of such pictures tends to infuse me with the thinking that “I have not travelled to anywhere so I am left out. My life experience is not as good as theirs….” However, having read the World Book of Happiness halfway, I have learned that I should not be affected by the society’s perceived standard of happiness. I should be realistic in setting my travel goals which are kind towards my budget. Most importantly, I should ask, “will the trip make me happy for very long? Is it better to spend less on my travelling and direct the fund to enhance my day-to-day life quality? Or maybe donate it to the needy since research has shown that money can buy you more happiness when you spend it on others even though you have a low pay?  If I am going for a trip, I would hope to have my  loved ones coming along.
  3. When we feel exhausted talking to someone, be it our family members, it is fine for us to keep a distance from him/her to avoid further emotional/verbal abuse. It’s alright as everyone has the rights to respect and peace of mind. There’s no need to compromise your happiness for anyone. People should learn to respect your personal boundary. We are all humans with a heart within. It’s best not to retaliate and still try to fulfill your family obligations but it is perfectly fine to draw out for some private time. You will thank yourself in the long run.

That’s all from me. What are your internal goals for 2018?

Happy New Year! May you have new growth in 2018:)

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