Slow down, May…let them wait willingly

Faster, faster, faster
I always told myself
Quick bath,
Finish assignments quickly
Eat fast
Quickly complete my tasks
Read fast
Talk fast
Decide fast
Promise fast
Cook quickly
Walk fast
Don’t make people waiting

This quick manner is impinging on my life
It makes me nervous and anxious
and unproductive
This overly quick manner has affected many areas of my life in a bad manner
I drop shower spray, shampoo bottles, comb…in my bathroom almost every single time I bath
I am not kidding

I scald my lip almost every day when I have hot soup/vermicelli soup

I cannot understand the online news, journals, books that I am reading even though they are written in simple English

I signed up for 1-year gym membership even though I knew I would not be able to attend gym frequently for one year due to the fact that I might leave the city where the gym is located

I signed up for direct sales membership every time a direct sales person approached me for business

I accepted a job that offered me an extremely low salary that didn’t match my qualification…a job with little space for personal development

My cooking skill sucks even though I have been cooking all this while

When people are waiting for me, even for just a five minutes, I get panicked and speed up

Why?
Why?
Why?

…because when I was a kid, my parents were busy running a shop to earn money in order to support our family….My parents were very busy….We were asked to finish our meals fast…so that my mum could wash the dishes and get back to work in time…

We were asked to bath quickly so that my dad could bath after us and get back to work…so that my mum could use the bathroom to wash our clothes…by the time she washed our clothes, we would have finished bathing and gave her all the dirty clothes…

My parents eat fast, bath fast as well…since last time till now…never changes

I remember…before my school camp…I was reminded to bath fast and act fast so that other campers got to use the bathroom and I could follow the fast schedule of the camp.
Time is my parents’ great concern.
I was trained to be fast as a kid.

Being a grown-up, I realize it brings bad effects to my life and study
It doesn’t serve me anymore
It is overly stressful
not the good kind of stress anymore
last time, it served me
now, no more
I need to get rid of it

So, take a break, May
Take it easy
The world will wait for you willingly
Enjoy your slow moments
Relax, dear May…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s