A secret to tell you

I had been a very pampered girl since small
I got whatever I asked for
I felt upset whenever something was taken away from me

My life was too peaceful and happy
My life was too protected

Now, I am a big girl
At first,
I became very obsessive
Whichever nice things I saw,
I must get it in my hands
I had been very stubborn
maybe due to my horoscope
I felt depressed when I couldn’t have my free will

In my eyes, there was only my happiness, my love, my future, my feeling, my hope, my life, my dream…
Nothing that was unrelated to me
Days and days
I only counted my blessings
I felt depressed
while comparing my blessings to others’
as there was always a better person

During depression,
I have made myself occupied with enlightening things
I have enhanced my productivity
I am starting to feel the meaning of my life
I get distracted from my loss

I watch Taiwanese dramas
I get to know some poor characters who end up in hot soup
Although life seems to be hopeless and difficult
there are helping hands and loving hearts
This is a nice angle to view life
Be it happy or sad
Life is still a blessing

I watch some sweet couples’ life
I can’t help smiling at them
Sweetness penetrates my heart
Happiness just finds me again

I had been preoccupied with my own things
Too obsessive of my gains and loss
This is selfish
I am going to change to the right direction
Time to preoccupy myself with people’s happiness
Then, my heart will be enriched
I can find blessings in taking care and giving regards
Then, I will be a forever-happy girl on this land

Focus on people’s happiness and I can get mine
Focus on my happiness and I can be the most dangerous person to myself
Which is my choice?
I had better choose the primary

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