Realisation

It was awful before I continued with my anti-psychotic. Now, I am getting better. I learned something.

There is always something to lose in life as victory and failure are part and parcel of our life. Life does not only come with happiness but also sorrow.  

Sometimes, we have to go through the dark tunnel, feel the darkness. Let us realize how important sunlight is. Accept the cruel wall the traps us in the darkness. Learn that the cruel wall is not movable. Walk through it instead of hurting your hands by crashing the wall blindly.You can come to the other side of the tunnel and see sunlight.

Ya, I have heard of believing in dreams and turning impossibilities to possibilities by taking action. However,for me, it is not universally applied, especially when it comes to relationship. I mean you can’t make all your friends like you or forgive you. You can’t because this is mutual. It needs respect. Respect means…you can’t intrude their privacy. I mean they have their own friends. You can be perfect, but doesn’t mean you can make anyone you like to love you.

The darkness is like a mirror. You smile at it. It smiles back. You weep in front of it, it weeps too. So, I shall laugh at it. Life shouldn’t be so serious, anyway. See it at the brighter side. Joke about it when people talk about it. When you are looking happy, people believe that you are happy. When everyone think you are happy and celebrate your happiness with you. Having them around, you believe that you are happy. It’s like a reflection of mirror. All comes back to you.

I have got back to my medication due to sleepless nights, loss of appetite, low concentration, lack of interest in daily activities as well as forgetfulness. Just realised the real me without the drug. However, after discussing with my parents, it has been decided that we are going to consult my favourite psychiatrist (about being med-free) in Penang after my industrial training.

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