I was a dead person this morning. ops, I mean ‘dead person’.
My eyelids were so heavy that they were half-open. I was not conscious of people and things around. I couldn’t write. I barely saw. I couldn’t think. No sentence could be made at all for my first long article. So sleepy that I was half-asleep on the chair.
When Bel asked me whether I wanted to carry magazines, I agreed happily. Not so sleepy, at least. Back to my desk, back to sleepy mode. Bel asked me whether I can manage another interview this Tuesday. I agreed with a sleepy tone. She couldn’t hear clearly. Even when I heard about the second interview during my internship, I was still sleepy.Imagine how sleepy I was.
Without any solution, I grabbed a cup of coffee. Then, I managed to finish the article before my working hours ended. However, I went to toilet to clear my bowel at least thrice due to caffeine-intolerance.
Well, this condition shouldn’t continue. I guess it’s time to cut off my antipsychotic intake that makes me a good sleeper. Before this, I tried a few times but failed as insomnia came in. Now,I would like to try again. Hope to succeed as how I battled against weight gain due to this chemical.
For myself, I am looking forward to a life free of chemical dependence. This is for kidney health and a better control of my mental health. Olanzapine has stopped me from donating blood for a couple of times.
After almost 6 years, it’s time to get rid. I will try and see what I am capable of. When I was learning Christianity, I heard of drug addicts who had recovered from addiction through God’s love without any help from chemical substances. My case should be simpler than this.
No harm, try and see.